Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Something Unromantic

After a month of being MIA in the blogosphere, I finally got my hands back on the keyboard waiting for the creative juices to start flowing. Well, actually, I think I just need to de-stress for a while 'coz the past few days have been so stressful, I can't even put into words. My body clock is so messed up I might as well sleep standing or never sleep at all. Why does everything get so hard when you reach adulthood?? Why??Okaaaay, I'm gonna stop complaining now. I just needed to let that out.

Speaking of body clock, I've been having trouble sleeping these past few days. Sleep has been so elusive that I resorted to writing on my tickler in the middle of the night. This is entirely a product of insomnia and stress and does not have any affinity to my life whatsoever (and I'm not being defensive.haha). I don't usually write anything romantic in this blog as you may have noticed, but, allow me to be mushy and corny for once, okay? So here is an excerpt of what I wote:

"I'm kinda' missing you, which is funny 'coz I'm always missing you, even when we're together. I try desperately to act like I'm not interested in you but I end up looking more transparent than ever. I wish I could read you though, what your thoughts are, what you think about me, what you don't think about me, or whether you think about me at all! But I can't read you. As transparent as I am, so as impenetrable (for lack of a better term) are you. 

There were times when I wanted to just stare at you but then I get worried of what you might think when you look back so I just turn away, only to find out minutes later that I'm doing the same thing all over again. There were times too that I just want to talk to you but I don't wanna be the one to start up the conversation. I mean, do I just say, "you seem interesting, tell me more about yourself'. C'mon, how awkward is that? I wish you would just talk to me first.

The last time we were together was prolly one of the happiest I have ever been. I secretly hoped you would sit beside me during that time. And you did! You even sit so close, I could hardly breathe. And then you brought your face so close to me to whisper something and I couldn't concentrate on what you were saying 'coz all I could think of was to kiss you right then and there. Geeez.

And then at the end of the day, I thought you were gonna walk me home but you didn't. So I was wondering again what you were thinking or whether you thought about walking me home. It would give me comfort knowing at least you thought about it. And now, I can't sleep. I keep thinking about you and the time I will have to wait to see you again. I just wish you were thinking about me too."

Aaaaand now I'm having second thoughts whether I would post this. This is so not me. So if you are able to read it now, you'd know I finally had the courage to click that 'publish' button.hahaha.

I have  no idea when I would be able to post an entry again. I'll try to squeeze in an outfit post this weekend 'coz I'm finally going home! I'll see you then!



  1. Hahahahaha cute! As I was reading, some memories flashed back wherein as if I felt that I am the one telling those lines. Hahaha. Drama.


  2. Beautifully written.


  3. I've missed your posts! Keep on writing - this is superb. :)


  4. Nice come back post! Beautiful words! Keep on writing! :)

  5. Love this post^^ You have such a great blog!

    part of me♥mfashionfreak

    I'm trying to reach certain amount of followers for my new giveaway since it's my 1 year blog anniversary soon. I'd love to follow you if you would do the same for me? :)

  6. Hello Biang! I just nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award! I love your posts and your blog! You're a really good writer :)

    Kisses! xxx


  7. I bet he's thinking about you too, sweetie. This is such a lovely post. Don't be hesitant to share here anything you want, it's your blog anyway. Following you. :)